Suck it, cavities!

Damn, my pie hole hurts.  Tomorrow it is going to hurt sooo much, I am not above faking pain so the dentist injects me with the legal limit of Novocain.  Today was just a cleaning, but since drug addicts tend to put off little things like health and child support, my soon to be x didn't deem it necessary to visit the dentist for, well, since the day we met.  Luis, my plaque removing buddy, had to break out the heavy artillery-jackhammer and backhoe-to chisel years of nastiness off my teeth.  No one held my hand which is a huge improvement for me; I have been known to scream bloody murder at the top of my asthma filled lungs to the dismay of my previous dentists, since I have had the following medieval procedures since I was a little carpet-biter:  Fillings on 16 of my molars, a root canal on one of my top front teeth after a piece of sheet metal knocked it out, 4 teeth pulled (because my orthodontist said my mouth was too small for my teeth.  My Mommy couldn't believe it either.), a crown on root canal tooth, four years of orthodontia, and in recent years, an incomplete implant that has given me permanent nerve damage from incorrect placement.  Sometimes I drool and have food in the corner of my mouth that I cannot feel and have no clue is there.  It makes for great dining out. 
Soon I will be getting an actual tooth where the implant hole is.  Which will be nice, being able to smile with less of a jack-o-lantern effect.  I will be sure to give that shit-eating grin again to everyone I know, and am known for. 
It is no secret I live in Colombia, and partake in the local offerings.  Lately it has been legally permissive to carry cocaine, and I believed it to be a sign of good things to come.  Well, I was right!Here's proof that sniffing stuff is beneficial, and thanks Salon, for the info on Special K!  Maybe Ecstasy will make a comeback next, and you'll never hear from me again!  Dream on, people, I am a survivor.  I've been told so, by a doctor, just yesterday.  Ok, an optician, and not a doctor-doctor.  Still, she did tell me my best friend Sadie has cataracts.  Have a day!